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Oct 282015

Welcome to another Halloween themed top 10 list. This year it’s about my most favorite wicked witches in pop culture. Just to set the record straight, there is a difference between witchcraft and sorcery, although it is hard to tell sometimes. Be sure to check out my Top 10 Wicked Sorceresses list for a comparison. Now here are the witches.

#10) Witchiepoo (Billie Hayes) from H.R. Pufnstuf: Witches don’t come any sillier than her. In fact, you can tell just by the sound of her name that Witchiepoo is more funny than creepy. She is intent on capturing young Jimmy and stealing his talking flute Freddie, but never succeeds. It doesn’t help that Witchiepoo has bumbling henchmen and a talking castle that doesn’t believe in her. Of course that’s what makes this witch so interesting and memorable.

#9) The Sanderson Sisters from Hocus Pocus: Known as Winifred (Bette Midler), Mary (Kathy Najimy), and Sarah (Sarah Jessica Parker), this trio of witches intends to steal the life force from children for the soul purpose of staying forever young. They tend to bumble through situations while adjusting to the more modern world, since they’re from 300 years in the past, but that’s what makes them hilarious. However, these witches are also dangerous and creepy, so you definitely don’t want to get on their bad sides.

#8) Mirror Queen (Monica Bellucci) from The Brothers Grimm: This nameless beauty was vain and selfish, then eventually killed by the plague. Now as a vengeful spirit, the Mirror Queen has the power to possess an entire forest and capture young girls in creepy and mysterious ways to steal their youth. Seriously, what is it with old witches wanting to stay young?

#7) Maja from Adventure Time: This sky witch is known for taking various objects that contain sentimental affection for great power. In addition to that, Maja can fly, shoot bolts of electricity from her hands, and has an edgy distorted voice. At least she believes in fair trade, compared to most wicked witches.

#6) Taminella Grinderfall from Muppets franchise: This character was always cast as the wicked witch in some of the old Muppet fairytale specials like Tales of the Tinkerdee and The Frog Prince. Her methods of deceit are often silly and easy to see through, but they always seem to succeed, especially with King Goshposh. Since Taminella was never featured again after her defeat in The Frog Prince, she has definitely become underrated.

#5) Bellatrix Lestrange (Helena Bonham Carter) from Harry Potter franchise: Among many of Voldemort’s followers, Bellatrix is the most loyal as well as the most psychotic. She takes pleasure in killing anyone who crosses her and has sparked a personal vendetta with Neville Longbottom, since she was the one who tortured his parents. What really makes Bellatrix stand out is her crazy and sadistic persona, which is something any evil master ought to look for in a henchwoman.

#4) Theodora (Mila Kunis) from Oz the Great and Powerful: The Wicked Witch of the West has always been an iconic character. However, it’s the one in this movie version that stands out because it reveals how this wicked witch came to be. It’s so interesting to know that Theodora used to be good, then was driven to become a heartless monster. I’ve never been able to see the Wicked Witch of the West the same way again after that.

#3) Evil Willow (Alyson Hannigan) from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Willow Rosenberg is a witch that has always been a loyal member of Buffy’s Scooby team. In season six, her girlfriend Tara was murdered and that pushed Willow to a breaking point. That drove her to take revenge and nearly destroy the world. It can be tough to see such a good character go bad, but Evil Willow’s edgy presence and determination makes her a witch you wouldn’t want to face in a dark alley.

#2) Queen Jadis (Tilda Swinton) from Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe: Best referred to as the White Witch, this self-proclaimed queen rules the land of Narnia with an iron fist and turns anyone who crosses her into stone. She won’t hesitate to hurt or kill others and is quick to judge when her servants’ loyalty is compromised.

Jadis has made appearances in the sequels and even the animated version was good. One thing is for certain. The White Witch is as evil as they come.

#1) Nancy Downs (Fairuza Balk) from The Craft: This troubled teen is the head of her coven and desires great power, so she can use it to get what she wants. Eventually, Nancy lets that go to her head and ends up losing her sanity. As wickedly crazy as she is, I think Nancy is also likable, especially when she smiles. That is why I rank her at the top of this list.

Feb 142011

The remake of the original horror classic, The Stepford Wives (Special Collector’s Edition) features a modern twist on grown men wanting the perfect wives with the solution of robotic technology. No assembly required.

After TV executive Joanna Eberhart (Nicole Kidman) loses her job, she, her husband Walter (Matthew Broderick), and their kids move to from New York City to a nice little suburb community called Stepford, Connecticut, where everything is perfect, maybe too perfect.

Perky realtor Claire Wellington (Glenn Close) shows Joanna around the town. Soon after that, they visit the day spa. There, Claire teaches aerobics to a whole group of perky women. It’s hilarious when they do their unusual workout called Clairobics. “Because her name is Claire.” That’s mainly because it annoys Joanna.

Soon one of the ladies, Sara Sunderson (Faith Hill), malfunctions like a robot, but recovers quickly, thanks to Claire’s husband Mike (Christopher Walken). Oddly, Joanna and her new friends Bobbie (Bette Midler) and Roger (Roger Bart) are the only ones who are suspicious. They go visit Sara at her house and find her having a wild time with her husband. Is that normal? Meanwhile, Walter doesn’t notice anything unusual. He even sees one of the wives work like an ATM. Now isn’t that strange?

Joanna and Bobbie head over to the Men’s Association to see what’s going on. They soon find that Roger has changed. Something must have happened to him, but what? Later, Joanna does some research and finds out that all of the perky wives used to be highly successful business women before moving to Stepford. It sounds like a weird mystery. She goes to tell Bobbie, but it’s too late. She too has changed into one of them. Joanna is on her own now and learns that she is next.

Soon the mystery unfolds. All of the men, including Walter, felt highly insecure to their very rich wives. So they put NANO chips in the women’s brains and add some specifications to make them into human robots with no will of their own. It’s scary, but amazing with Mike as the mastermind behind it all. Or is he?

I saw the original version of The Stepford Wives from 1975 and it was nothing like this one, but at least it was easier to follow the story line after understanding it.

I thought this was a great horror comedy, even though it was considered a major box office flop. My sister once thought that the main reason I liked it was because of the AOL joke. “Is that why the women are so slow?” That’s not true. What I enjoyed most was the story line that was featured like a weird mystery. It’s terrific.